Me and My Tardis
“Headline?" he asked.
"'Swing Set Needs Home,'" I said.
"'Desperately Lonely Swing Set Needs Loving Home,'" he said.
"'Lonely, Vaguely Pedophilic Swing Set Seeks the Butts of Children,'" I said.”
- The Fault In Our Stars

Home Theme Ask me anything

kristoffbjorgman:

i’m sorry i had to

(via assbuttelsa)

hvngers:

I’m addicted to sleep and not sleeping
do you see my dilemma

(via fake-mermaid)

carbs99999:

Jacobs by Marc Jacobs for Marc by Marc Jacobs in collaboration with Marc Jacobs for Marc by Marc Jacobs

(Source: dogs99999, via fake-mermaid)

cockringtoss:

hearing teachers swear keeps me young

(via moonwalksaway)

i may act like i’m sassy but if you’re mean to me there is a 900% chance i’ll cry

(Source: bl-ossomed, via fake-mermaid)

the-time-goddess-of-221b:

smoochlock:

so my mum told me that as a kid she would peel an apple and throw the peel over her shoulder, and the peel would take the shape of the first letter of her future spouse. naturally, i decided to do it and

image

i’m fucking crying 

it says ‘no.’

it literally says NO.

oh my god

(via moonwalksaway)

astonishingly:

romeo thought juliet deleted her blog so he deleted his and she was so sad she deleted for real

(via fake-mermaid)

drunktrophywife:

I wish tumblr was like survivor and we could vote people off the island

(via baracknobama)

ashthunirwin:

when you have to clap your hands for someone you don’t like

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(via isacknewton)

milaskunny:

madamebassdrum:

msjewbooty:

the Clue Klux Klan…solving mysteries in a racist sort of way

i think you mean “the police department”

image

(via baracknobama)

barackalicious:

jimbertimber:

theres a Meme Page in the yearbook

our entire yearbook is meme themed how do you think i feel

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(Source: nyehs, via isacknewton)

spoken-not-written:

THE CUTEST THING IS WHEN SOMEONE CAN’T STOP SMILING LIKE THEY SMILE THEN THEY TRY TO NOT SMILE THEN THEY END UP SMILING MORE AND THEIR CHEEKS GO ALL CUTE AND SAPOIDSP[DOSADPSA[]PS[]DSAPD[]SAP

(via isacknewton)

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